Type Eight with Manda Carpenter

Manda Carpenter is a writer living in Chicago with her husband as they foster parent and love on their community. She believes that there isn’t a single person you would not love if you knew their story. She desires to be transparent because #ImpressingIsExhausting. Connect with her at mandacarpenter.com or on Instagram: @mandacarpenter.

How long have you known about the Enneagram?

I heard about it approximately one year ago.

How long have you known your type?

Probably 8 months now.

What do you wish people knew about being your type?

Not all Eights look the same. (Or any type for that matter.)

A male Eight is considered strong and is typically applauded, whereas a female Eight is often labeled a not-so-nice name. It’s a really hard thing for me.

Healthy Eights might not even come across like an Eight because they have become so self-aware that their natural tendency to dominate, lead, and control is consciously suppressed and/or redirected to make space for others. (Something I’ve been practicing a lot lately.)

Eights do have feelings (lots of them actually), and words go beyond a hard exterior, so don’t treat an Eight as though they are invincible despite the fact that they come across that way most of the time.

Eights don’t mean to come across abrasive or harsh, they’re simply being direct.

To love an Eight well is to accept and embrace their best qualities (as with every type, in fact) and be as direct with them as they are with you. Eights appreciate straight shooters more than any other type.

Eights define fun much differently than a seven.

What do you like about being your type?

We get what we want and we get things done.

We are passionate and defend those we love and causes we’re passionate about relentlessly.

We can make drastic changes in a short amount of time.

We enjoy being able to control the mood and conversation in a room.

We like that our assertiveness gets us places.

We can face conflict easily.

We don’t dwell on failure and are resilient, seeing everything as a learning opportunity and moving on to something else quickly to recover.

What challenge(s) does being your type bring?

Being misunderstood and received poorly by people who feel like we’re “too much” or “too intense.”

Going through life constantly trying to control every aspect of our lives can be exhausting.

It’s hard not to dominate and control every conversation and situation.

It can be frustrating to work with, or even be friends with, people who are timid.

We aren’t offended easily, but almost always manage to offend others through our assertiveness and bulldozer ways.

We can come across egotistical.

Whether it’s good or bad, we don’t need as much emotionally from others as long as we have something we’re working towards, and we can channel all of our energy towards it.

This is part of a 31-day series: The Enneagram. To read all posts, head here.